Today, the most amazing cat I have ever known has died. I'll admit, I'm a bit of a cat person... But she was different. She's always seemed more like a person to me than an animal. She's been my friend, not a pet. Today, when I realized that she was gone forever made me really sit and think about what she was to me.
She's a difficult animal to describe. Since the day I got her, I knew she was different. If I was distressed, she consoled me. If I invited a man over that wasn't right for me, she drove him off. If someone visited that I didn't like, she hissed at them and scratched them. If I loved someone, she loved them back. She helped me make tough decisions, and was there for me when times got rough. Many of my life's choices revolved around her, and it never felt strange.
I have always believed in reincarnation, but never really thought hard about it. Today, however, I did - and this is what brings me solace. I really and truely believe that Pywacket wasn't really a cat - not in her heart. She was an old soul stuck in a cat's body, I imagine that relief of being free of that restrictive body must have been great. Now she can move on to a life role that better suits her, and I can only hope that I meet her again in my life. I feel rediculous saying this about a cat, but she was my soul mate (I should mention that I don't believe that soul mates always come in the form of lovers and that everyone has several).
This also brings me to question the philosphy of animal guides/spirit guides. I've always considered them to be an invisible force... But she came into my life just when I really needed her, and now that my life has some sort of substance and stability to it, she's gone. Was she my spirit guide? I'd like to know what others think of this.
Anyway.. Thanks for reading. I hope she knows that I'll always be thinking of her.